It’s not you: 9 things to expect when you travel in Bangladesh

Note: I originally wrote this post after my first visit to Bangladesh in 2019. Now I’ve been back a second time in March 2024, and – other than the fact that this time I traveled with my husband rather than as a solo female – nothing on this list has changed. So, don’t worry. It’s not you, it’s Bangladesh:)

When I decided to travel in Bangladesh, I noticed that my plan generally drew a vaguely surprised reaction, like ‘Bangladesh? Really?’ It wasn’t alarm or concern. It was more like bewilderment, as though the country’s actual existence was up for debate. It’s got to be the last place anyone thinks of if they think of traveling in South Asia. Next to all its popular neighbors like India, Nepal, Sri Lanka…holidaying in Afghanistan probably comes to mind quicker. Bangladesh has sort of been lost in the shuffle; there’s a forgotten feel to it. (Let me just interject here, I’ve now been to Afghanistan since I originally wrote this post. Both countries draw surprised reactions.)

If you decide to go to Bangladesh – and especially if you go alone – you may occasionally find yourself questioning your decision. Like when you wake up from a deep sleep on the train to find every person in the carriage staring intently at you. Or maybe when you’re perfectly comfortable eating at a bakery, but the baker tells you that you are in grave danger. Don’t worry. It’s not you, it’s Bangladesh.

Before I went, I didn’t really know what to expect from South Asia’s forgotten country either. So let me share my roundup of surprises and random quirks you will just have to get used to, when you’re traveling in Bangladesh.

1. No question is too personal. ‘Madam, where is your husband?’. If you are female, and even worse than that, if you are alone, then get used to this one in particular. Upon arrival in Bangladesh, and every single day after that, multiple times a day – I had to establish both the existence and the whereabouts of my husband. Husband questions inevitably lead to baby questions so from time to time I’d spontaneously volunteer information about our son, Hugo (Hugo’s a cat). If you’ve been married any longer than nine months (and people will ask), announcing that you have no children is not going to go down well, and will result in pity at the very least. Don’t think you can get away with vague promises about having babies ‘soon’, unless you are ready to lie (convincingly) about the next question too: ‘How old are you?’. Basically, if you aren’t married, then just pretend to be, and toss in a fake baby for good measure. It makes things easier for everyone.
2. Staring is as popular as cricket. Get over it. Staring at strangers as a means of passing the time of day is something you’ll encounter in a lot of countries around the world but it’s a major hobby in Bangladesh. You can draw a crowd of interested onlookers just by sitting down at a street stall and eating. Stop in the market to chat and a crowd will gather to see what you’re up to. They’ll closely observe your entire conversation, eyes darting back and forth between you and your interlocutor like fans at a tennis match. Many people will want to document this encounter with a photo or twelve. ‘Madam, selfie? Selfie Madam?’ – is a phrase that haunts my dreams.
3. You’ll gain new followers. I’m not referring to your social media. I mean literally, people following you around. During my time in Bangladesh I was followed from time to time mainly by people who were bent on assisting me with things I didn’t want any assistance with. Like showing me to and from trains, volunteer guiding at historical sites, police officers (both real and possibly fake) checking if I was safe, and random citizens who just wanted to practice speaking English. If I genuinely wanted help I’d accept it. In other cases I politely refused. Occasionally I had to ask to be left alone, in order to get away from my well-meaning stalker. Which brings me to the next item on this list.
4. Safety warnings for no discernible reason. Ever been warned off visiting an ashram due to extreme danger? I didn’t think so. But that happened to me in Sylhet, and in plenty of other places too. One man warned me not to spend time by myself anywhere in the entire country. More than one person took it upon themselves to inform me that ‘Bangladesh people are not good’. Bangladesh does have a long history of political unrest and violent protests. I saw heavy police presence during Friday prayers, and it’s definitely best to avoid big crowds (easier said than done, in Dhaka). But I don’t think that justifies staying away altogether, or constantly approaching a traveler to inform them that the very place they are standing is not safe for foreigners/women/solo-travelers or foreign-women-solo-travelers. And ironically, not one of these safety-conscious individuals tried to warn me about the most obvious and real danger in the entire country: any form of transportation.

   

   And that brings me to my next point…

5. India’s trains start to seem orderly. Actually India in general starts to seem pretty chill. Bangladesh is probably one of the very few places in the world that can make train travel in India seem sedate. Boarding (or better yet, disembarking) a train late at night at the station in Old Dhaka is no small feat. The glare of lights from the trains, patches of impenetrable darkness in between platforms, hordes of people rushing in every direction. Most people ignore the footbridges and cross the tracks, or just linger on them, waiting for the incoming train to get dangerously close before they move. A train pulls into the station, packed with riders both inside and out. Total chaos ensues: pandemonium as passengers wrestle each other to get in and out of windows, let alone the doors.

   

6. Shalwar kameez is the new black. That’s traditional clothing – a long top over baggy trousers, with a flowy scarf, and you’ll probably want to buy some. I bought a couple because I like them but also because (speaking as a female traveler): regular t-shirts draw attention to your chest. See point 2. Also, a shalwar kameez is way more comfortable even than yoga pants. Actually, yoga pants would be wildly uncomfortable here – again, see point 2.
7. Five-star service at a no-star hotel. Check into a hotel, unpack a little, maybe start running the cold water for your bucket shower. And surprise! The hall boy will burst in, without knocking. Even if you always lock your door, he will rattle the doorknob frantically instead of just knocking and waiting. Why all this urgency? Because enthusiastically spraying the room with toxic clouds of bug spray every night is part of the service.
8. Banana pancakes? Nope. There aren’t a lot of travelers around, nor the amenities that tend to accompany them. This is both good and bad. It’s real, authentic, independent-travel territory, not just another typical destination crawling with backpackers. But in those cases where you want to find others to split a boat trip with, you’re most likely out of luck.
9. No hassle; real friendliness. Best of all, and probably related to point 8, you won’t find touts wandering around flogging souvenirs and pestering you to book activities. When you’re exploring a market and it’s obvious you aren’t going to buy anything (Live eels? A couple of roosters? A giant funerary wreath?) the vendors are still genuinely welcoming. Anyone who can speak a few words of English will probably want to chat politely. Go to the same restaurant or shop a few times and the staff will treat you like family, calling out your order on sight, offering you little tastes of everything or small gifts, or joining in when you FaceTime your mom.

   

Whenever I mention my travels in Bangladesh to anyone (before or since), they usually just ask ‘why…?’. All I can say to that is, well, why not? It was a lot of fun; it’s different. The people are nice and I felt welcome there. If you want to read more about the ins and outs of travelling in Bangladesh, have a look at my stories, here.

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Are you in India, thinking about heading for Bangladesh? Or vice versa? Here’a post about crossing the Benapole/Petrapole border by road between Bangladesh and India.